Nervous Mouse Clicking

Hello, my name is Janina. This is my story.

Occasionally on webpages there are those "click me and I'll give you something" ads floating to the side of everything. These ads used to scare me because what if you clicked on them and you're obliged to buy something. My mouse would move very carefully past these ads making sure it didn't touch even the edge -in the off-chance that my hand would suddenly develop a nervous clicking habit and I'd be stuck with 80 Mini Coopers. I was always very cautious not to get tangled up with that stuff.

Then one day I was sitting at my computer and out of the side of my eye I saw a smiling Elmo and the red button next to him winked at me and said "Go on CLICK ME, just this once." I thought to myself-it's Elmo, and Elmo loves his friends, he would NEVER entice them to detriment. So just to see what happens, I clicked it. Elmo moved. Oh boy did he move! And hey I'm not stuck with 1000 iPods! I can click again! And again! And Again!!!I DON'T HAVE TO PURCHASE ANYTHING! And that's how the nervous clicking habit was formed. Elmo deceived me.

Now I take every opportunity to make the mad scientist shave the legs of some monstrous woman, the cowboy lasso the little calf, and help get Gramma across the busy street. I have formed a very bad very distracting habit that keeps me occupied for at least 5 minutes every day.

The horrible side-effect of my habit is that I no longer know what it means to double-click. How can one be satisfied to click twice and stop? I just don't understand it anymore. I have to click and double click and triple click. I have become a social outcast. In groups I'm withdrawn because all I can think of is my next click. My friends say they don't want to be around someone with a sore pointer finger. I am ashamed of what I've become.

So in conclusion, children, remember my sad story and my life when you are faced with a tempting red button. Just say NO to click.